Who? Hu?

(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

Bush: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Rice: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
Bush: Great. Lay it on me.
Rice: Hu is the new leader of China.
Bush: That's what I want to know.
Rice: That's what I'm telling you.
Bush: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China ?
Rice: Yes.
Bush: I mean the fellow's name.
Rice: Hu.
Bush: The guy in China .
Rice: Hu.
Bush: The new leader of China .
Rice: Hu.
Bush: The Chinaman!
Rice: Hu is leading China .
Bush: Now whaddya asking me for?
Rice: I'm telling you Hu is leading China .
Bush: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China ?
Rice: That's the mans name.
Bush: That's who's name?
Rice: Yes.
Bush: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China ?
Rice: Yes, sir.
Bush: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China ?
I thought he was in the Middle East.
Rice: That's correct.
Bush: Then who is in China ?
Rice: Yes, sir.
Bush: Yassir is in China ?
Rice: No, sir.
Bush: Then who is?
Rice: Yes, sir.
Bush: Yassir?
Rice: No, sir.
Bush: Look, Rice. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.
Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Rice: Kofi? (Kofi Anan)
Bush: No, thanks.
Rice: You want Kofi?
Bush: No.
Rice: You don't want Kofi.
Bush: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk.
And then get me the U.N.
Rice: Yes, sir.
Bush: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Rice: Kofi?
Bush: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Rice: And call who?
Bush: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Rice: Hu is the guy in China .
Bush: Will you stay out of China ?!
Rice: Yes, sir.
Bush: And stay out of the Middle East !
Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Rice: Kofi.
Bush: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Rice: Rice, here.

Bush: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too.
Maybe we should send some to the guy in China .
And the Middle East.
Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East ?

理論與實際

Theory is when you know everything but nothing works.
Practice is when everything works but no one knows why.
In this class, theory and practice are combined: nothing
works and no one knows why.

He is not George.

George died in a fire. He's badly burn and can't be recognized.
Thus, cop called his two friends, Mike and John, to identify George.
When Mike came and saw the body. He told cop "Flip him over."
Cop did what he said. Mike looked at George's butt and said "no, not George."
Cop asked "how can u be sure?" Mike answered, "Cuz George has two assholes."
Then it's John's turn. John said the same thing, "Flip him over."
Cop fliped the body. John looked at George's butt and said "no, that's not him."
Cop asked "how can u be sure?" John said "Cuz George has two assholes."
The cops were confused and called both Mike and John.
The captain said "Are you sure that's not George."
Both answered "Yeah". The captain said "cuz he has two assholes? how?"
Mike and John said "Whenever three of us go to village, we always hear
people said 'lo, there comes George with those two assholes!"